First 10 days of Dhul Hijjah

The first ten days are the great blessings from Allah to Muslim Ummah. A Muslim should grasp this opportunity and worship Allah so he is rewarded, as Allah has given us many ways to worship him to gain His blessings.

Ibn Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with him), reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

“There are no days during which good deeds are more beloved to Allah than these days; meaning the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah. They inquired: “Not even Jihad in the cause of Allah?” He said: “Not even Jihad in the cause of Allah, unless one goes out for Jihad sacrificing both his life and property and returning with neither.”
(Sahee Al-Bukhari)

In another Hadith, Ibn Umar reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him), said: “There are no days during which good deeds are greater or more beloved to Allah than these ten days. So recite more often the Tahleel (Laa Ilaaha Illallah), Takbeer (Allahu Akbar), Tahmeed (Alhamdulillah).
(Imam Ahmad)

Jaabir reported that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “The best day is the Day of Arafah. There are no days during which good deeds are greater or more beloved to Allaah than these ten days. So recite more often the Tahleel (Laa Ilaaha Illallah) Takbeer (Allahu Akbar),Tahmeed (Alhamdulillah).”

Among the good deeds which the Muslim should strive to do during the first ten days of Dhul Hijjah are:

• Performing Haj and Umrah: The Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Performing Umrah and following it with another expiates sins that are committed in between. And the perfect Hajj would be requited with nothing other than Jannah.”

• Observing fasting on all or some of these days, particularly on the Day of Arafah. Abu Qataadah (may Allah be pleased with him) narrated that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said: “Observing fasting on the Day of Arafat; I expect Allah to expiate the sins that were committed during the preceding year, and the sins that will be committed in the year after”. (Sahee Muslim)

• Reciting takbeer, and Dhikr in these days - Ibn Umar and Abu Hurairah (may Allah be pleased with them) used to go out to the marketplaces during the first ten days of Dhul-Hijjah and recite out loud the takbeer and people would repeat it after them. Ishaaq (may Allah bestow mercy upon him) reported that the jurists (may Allah bestow mercy upon them) used to recite during the first ten days of Dhul Hijjah: Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Laa Ilaaha illallah, wallahu Akbar, wa lillaahil-hamd. It is commended to recite them out loud in marketplaces, at homes, roads, mosques and elsewhere.

• Accomplishing more good deeds of voluntary observances, such as Nawafil Salah, charity, Jihad, Qur’ânic recitation, enjoining the good and forbidding the wrong, and the like; for the rewards of such observances are multiplied during these days. Offering the sacrificial animal during the day of sacrifice and the Days of Tashreeq i.e. 4 days. It is the sunnah of Ibraheem, may Allah exalt his mention, in commemoration of the occasion when Allah ransomed Ibraheems son with a large ram. It has been authentically confirmed that the Prophet Mohammed (peace be upon him) sacrificed two black and white rams with horns with his own hands, and invoked the name of Allaah upon them, recited the takbeer, and placed his foot on their sides, when he slaughtered them. (Agreed upon). Its narrated from Abu Sa’id (may Allah be pleased with him) that the Prophet (peace be upon him) said “O Fatima come and stand by your sacrificial animal and witness it being slaughtered for surely, by the the first drop of blood, all your sins will be forgiven.” She asked: “O Rasullullah! Is this reward specifically for us, your family, or is it for us and the Muslims as well? He replied: “It is for us and for the Muslims.”(Al-Bazaar)

• Umm Salamah, (may Allah be pleased with her), said: When you see the new moon of Dhul Hijjah, and one of you wants to sacrifice an animal let him refrain from cutting or shaving his hair or clipping his finger nails, or toenails. In another version: Let him not cut his hair or his fingernails until he has slaughtered his sacrificial animal.

• The Muslim must make sure to observe Eid prayer in its designated place, and attend the Eid sermon. He should also know the purpose of Eid, and that its a day of giving thanks and a chance for accomplishing good deeds.

A Muslim should take advantage of these 10 days, do good deeds and ask Allah to grant success and guidance to the right path and repentance and relinquishing acts of disobedience and all sins.



SOURCE:
Islamic_Group

What is the Islamic perspective on spouses holding each other's hands in public?

There are three scenarios here:

1)If the spouses publicly hold hands in a manner that is intimate and expresses affection and sexual intimacy to the point that it draws people's attention towards them, then this would not be allowed.

Islam is a religion of shame and modesty. It teaches its followers to live a life that is modest and dignified. It also prohibits them from engaging in any action that would lead to an immoral atmosphere.

Allah Most High says:

'Come not near to shameful deeds, whether open or secret.'
(Surah al-An'am, V: 151)

Islam considers modesty part of faith, a fact which is stressed in several Hadiths. For example:

Sayyiduna Abd Allah ibn Umar (Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) passed by a man of Ansar who was admonishing his brother regarding modesty (haya). The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) said: 'Leave him, for modesty is (part) of Faith.'
(Sahih al-Bukhari & Sahih Muslim)

The Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) was also a practical example of modesty and bashfulness.

Sayyiduna Abu Sa'id al-Khudri (Allah be pleased with him) narrates that the Messenger of Allah (Allah bless him & give him peace) was more modest than the virgin behind the curtain (or in her apartment), and when he disliked anything, we recognised that from his face.'
(Sahih al-Bukhari & Sahih Muslim)

2) The second situation is where the spouses hold hands due to need and necessity (without expressing any intimacy or affection), such as when crossing a busy road or when in a crowded area (like when performing Hajj), so as not to become separated from each other.
The ruling for publicly holding hands in such situations is that this would be permissible (rather necessary at times), for Islam is a religion of mercy and takes people's needs into consideration.

3) The third situation is in between the above two, in that there is no real need for the spouses to hold hands neither do they express any intimacy or affection whilst holding hands in public. They merely hold hands in a casual and non-provocative manner.

In my humble opinion, the ruling on publicly holding hands in such a manner would depend on the local customs and norms (urf), and on the area and environment one resides in. A particular act may be considered modest in certain areas, whilst it may not be the case in other conservative societies. And as we know that local customs and traditions also have a role in determining the outcome of a particular ruling.

Allamah ibn Abidin (Allah have mercy on him) states in his Majmu'a al-Rasa'il:

"Local customs and habits (urf) is considered in (determining the laws of) Shariah, hence at times rulings will be based on them."
See: Ibn Abidin, Nashr al-Urf fi bina ba'd al-ahkam ala al-urf, P. 115)

Therefore, if one resides in a society where holding hands in public is considered offensive and immodest, then it would be wrong and blameworthy for the spouses to publicly hold hands. However, in some areas, this is not considered to be offensive, thus holding hands would be permitted in such areas. But this, as mentioned earlier, is in the case where hands are held casually and not in a manner that expresses intimacy or affection.

And Allah knows best

~Muhammad ibn Adam al-Kawthari
Darul Iftaa, Leicester, UK


SOURCE:
http://spa.qibla.com/issue_view.asp?HD=11&ID=4080&CATE=121

Funeral prayer in absentia, offering food to mourners and reading Qur’aan for the deceased

Questions:

If a family member dies overseas, what should the family do over here? 1. can we perform the janaza prayer, that means there will be two janaza prayers, one overseas and one here. Is it allowed? 2. Are we allowed to read the quran together and hopefully the blessing will go to the deceased? 3. Do we have to do a special Qur'an reading and invite people for a meal after three days and after 40 days also? This is being practiced back home and I am told that the spirit of the deceased comes to the house for 40 days and wait to get all these blessings. When I was back home I used to practice this but now I am told that the Prophet sws and His companions never did it. I want to do the right thing. Please give quotations from Qur'an and sunnah. And also if this practice is wrong, please advise what is the proper thing to do under this circumstance.


Answer:

Firstly: if a relative or close friend dies in another country, a person may travel to attend the funeral prayers if that is easy to do. There is nothing wrong with this traveling because it is traveling for a legitimate purpose, even though this action was not known among Muslims in the past. It was not done in the past because they were not able to do that, unlike today when traveling has become easier with faster methods of transportation.

With regard to offering the funeral prayer for the deceased in absentia, there is a great deal of difference of opinion among the scholars on this matter, because it is not reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) did that, except in the case of the Negus (ruler of Abyssinia), and it was not narrated that the Muslims outside of Madeenah prayed for the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) in absentia when he died, even though their love for him was so great.

Also, it is not reported that the Muslims prayed in absentia for any of the khulafaa’ al-raashideen (the rightly-guided khaleefahs, the first four leaders of Islam after the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him)) when they died. Prayer for the dead in absentia was not known among the Muslims even though circumstances might have dictated it, such as the eagerness of the Muslims to do something of benefit for their brothers, especially those who were held in high esteem by all the Muslims, or one to whom one is related or who one is fond of, which would make one seek to do something good for him by praying for him. For this reason, scholars such as Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah were of the view that the fact that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) prayed for the Negus was an exceptional case which applied only to him, because there was no one in the land where he died who could offer the janaazah prayer for him. In my view, this is a sound view in the light of the above. Some scholars say that the funeral prayer in absentia may be offered only for certain people among the ummah, such as famous scholars and just rulers; this view is close to the previous view.

On this basis, there is no reason why the funeral prayer should not be offered for the deceased both when one is present and in absentia.

Secondly:

Gathering to read Qur’aan and give the reward for that to the deceased is a bid’ah (reprehensible innovation), even if it is not done in return for any payment. If it is done in return for payment then it is haraam, because it is being done for a reason other than for the sake of Allaah, and any such action will not earn any reward. But if a person reads Qur’an by himself and gives the reward for that to a relative or friend, without gathering with others for that purpose and without seeking payment, then there are two scholarly views in this case, one of which says that it is permissible and that the reward for the reading will reach the deceased.

The second view is that it is not prescribed to give the reward for the reading to anyone, because there is no evidence (daleel) to indicate that this is prescribed.

Thirdly:

If the family of the deceased have a special reading, and invite people to a meal three days and forty days after the death, this is bid’ah (reprehensible innovation).

And every bid’ah is a going astray. The Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“Whoever invents something in this matter of ours (i.e., Islam) that is not a part of it will have it rejected.”

The action mentioned is a matter that has been invented in the religion, so it is to be rejected, and the one who does it is a sinner and will not be rewarded.

What people say about the soul of the deceased visiting the house after forty days to get the reward is a lie which has no basis. The person who told you that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and his Companions did not do any of these things was right. You did well to ask about the things of which you were unsure, and your eagerness to know the Sunnah of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and act accordingly is highly commendable. This is how the Muslim should be; his concern should be to know the truth so that he can follow it, and know what is false so that he can avoid it.

We ask Allaah to make us and you steadfast in following the Straight Path. May Allaah bless our Prophet Muhammad and his family and companions, and grant them peace.

~Shaykh ‘Abd al-Rahmaan al-Barraak


SOURCE:
Islamqa, Fatwa no. 4910

Ruling on reading Soorat Yaa-Seen for the dying and the deceased

We have to make a distinction here between the two issues:

Reading Yaa-Seen for one who is dying, and reading it for one who has died

With regard to reading Yaa-Seen for one who is dying, this practice has been reported from some of the Sahaabah. Imaam Ahmad reported in his Musnad from Safwaan:

“My shaykhs told me that they were with Ghudayf ibn al-Haarith al-Thumaani when he was dying. He said: ‘Can any of you read Yaa-Seen?’ So Saalih ibn Shurayh al-Sakooni recited it, and when he reached the fortieth aayah, Ghudayf passed away. My shaykhs used to say that when it is recited in the presence of one who is dying, it eases the pain of death.” That was the opinion of Safwaan. ‘Eesaa ibn al-Mu’tamir read it for Ibn Mab’ad (when the latter was dying).
[al-Musnad, 16355]

Al-Albaani said in Irwaa’ al-Ghaleel, 3/152:

“This is a saheeh sanad going back to Ghudayf ibn al-Haarith, may Allaah be pleased with him. Its men are thiqaat apart from ‘the shaykhs’ who are not named and are therefore unknown (majhool). But the fact that they are unknown is compensated for by their large number, especially since they are of the generation of the Taabi’een…”

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen said in al-Sharh al-Mumti’ fi Ahkaam al-Janaa’iz:

“Soorat Yaa-Seen may be recited over him (i.e., the one who is dying) for the one who thinks that the hadeeth is correct.” He explained that this is because this soorah contains good news of Paradise, as in the aayah (interpretation of the meaning): “It was said: ‘Enter Paradise.’…” [Yaa-Seen 36:26], and because it makes the passage of the soul easier, and other reasons.


Soorat Yaa-Seen for one who has died

As regards reading Soorat Yaa-Seen for one who has died, there is no saheeh hadeeth to indicate that this should be done. A hadeeth was narrated by Abu Dawood and others which says “Read Yaa-Seen over your dead”, but this hadeeth is not saheeh because its isnaad contains contradictions and narrators who are unknown (majhool). This was stated by al-‘Allaamah al-Albaani in Irwaa’ al-Ghaleel, hadeeth no. 688.

Reading Qur’aan over the dead is considered to be bid’ah (innovation), as he states at the end of his book Ahkaam al-Janaa’iz. Some people think that it should be read forty times over the deceased, and some of them may distribute copies of the Qur’aan among the mourners who gather to offer condolences so that they may read, or organize gatherings in the mosque to read it for the soul of the deceased. All of this has no basis whatsoever (in the sunnah), and these are innovated deeds of bid’ah which we should avoid and warn others against. And Allaah is the Source of strength.

~Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid


SOURCE:
Islamqa, Fatwa no. 734

The virtues of Soorat Yaa-Seen

Firstly:

Soorat Ya-Seen is one of the Makkan soorahs of the Qur’aan, containing eighty-three verses, with frequent pauses and short phrases which has a strong effect on the believing soul. Its main subject matter is the same as other Makkan soorahs; it speaks of Tawheed al-uloohiyyah and Tawheed al-ruboobiyyah (the Oneness of Allaah and of His Lordship) and the punishment for those who disbelieve in that. The issue that is focused on in this soorah is the issue of the Resurrection.

Secondly:

There are a number of ahaadeeth which speak of the virtues of this soorah, most of which are, however, false and fabricated, and some of which are slightly weak (da’eef). We have not found any saheeh hadeeth which speaks specifically of the virtues of Soorat Ya-Seen.

Among the reports which have been narrated concerning its virtues but classed as da’eef by the scholars of hadeeth include the following, which we are only quoting here to warn about them:

“Everything has a heart, and the heart of the Qur’aan is Ya-Seen; whoever reads it, it is as if he has read the Qur’aan ten times.”

“Whoever reads Soorat Ya-Seen in one night will be forgiven in the morning.”

“Whoever continues to read it every night then dies, will die as a shaheed (martyr).”

“Whoever enters the graveyard and reads Soorat Ya-Seen, their (punishment) will be reduced that day, and he will have hasanaat (reward) equal to the number of people in the graveyard.”

Thirdly:

Some people narrate a hadeeth which says “Ya-Seen is for that for which it is read,” meaning that reading Soorat Ya-Seen may cause needs to be met and may make things easier, according to the intention of the reader when he reads it.

We must note that it is incorrect to attribute these words to the Sunnah of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) or to any of the scholars among the Sahaabah, Taabi’een or imams. No such words have been narrated from any of them, rather they pointed out that this is false.

Al-Sakhaawi (may Allaah have mercy on him) said of this hadeeth:

"There is no basis for this version."

Al-Maqaasid al-Hasanah (741). Al-Qadi Zakariya said in Haashiyat al-Baydaawi: it is mawdoo’ (fabricated), as it says in Kashf al-Khafa’ (2/2215).

It is not permissible for anyone to attribute this hadeeth to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) or to speak of it in people’s gatherings. Whoever claims that experience shows this hadeeth to be true should be told:

Experience also shows that for many of those who read Ya-Seen to have their needs met, Allaah did not meet their needs, so why should we accept your experience and not the experience of others?

What Imam Ibn Katheer quoted in Tafseer al-Qur’aan il-‘Azeem (3/742) from some of the scholars, that one of the qualities of this soorah is that “it is never recited in the event of some difficult matter but Allaah makes it easy” is ijtihaad on their part, for which there is no evidence from the Qur’aan or Sunnah, or from the words of the Sahaabah or Taabi’een. Such ijtihaad cannot be attributed to Allaah or His Messenger, rather it can only be attributed to the one who said it, who may be right or wrong. It is not permissible to attribute to the Book of Allaah or the Sunnah of His Messenger anything but that which we are certain is part of it. Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Say (O Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم): (But) the things that my Lord has indeed forbidden are Al‑Fawaahish (great evil sins and every kind of unlawful sexual intercourse) whether committed openly or secretly, sins (of all kinds), unrighteous oppression, joining partners (in worship) with Allaah for which He has given no authority, and saying things about Allaah of which you have no knowledge”
[al-A’raaf 7:33]

We should point out here that many of those whose needs are met when they call upon Allaah (du’aa’) or recite such verses, have their needs met because of the humility and need for Allaah that they feel in their hearts, and their sincere turning to Him, not because of the du’aa’ that they recited or the du’aa’ that they offered beside a grave, and so on.

Shaykh al-Islam Ibn Taymiyah (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:

The reason why the needs of some of those who offered haraam du’aa’s are met is that one of them may be in desperate need, such that even if a mushrik were in that state, praying beside an idol, he would receive a response, because of his sincere turning to Allaah, even though saying du’aa’ beside the idol is shirk, even if his need is met by means of the one that he is taking as a mediator with Allaah, whether it is the occupant of the grave or someone else, still he will be punished for that and will be thrown into Hell, if Allaah does not forgive him.

Then he said: Hence many people get it wrong, because they hear about some prominent righteous people did an act of worship or recited a certain du’aa’ and they found that that act or worship or du’aa’ had an effect, so they took that as evidence that this act of worship or du’aa’ is something good to do, and they regard that action as a Sunnah, as if a Prophet had done it. This is a mistake for the reasons we have mentioned above, especially since the effects of that action only came as the result of sincerity in the person’s heart when he did it, then his followers do it without sincerity, so they are harmed by it, because this action is not prescribed, so they do not attain the reward for following, and they do not have the same sincerity as the first one did, who may be forgiven because of his sincerity and sound intention.

And Allaah knows best.


SOURCE:
Islamqa, Fatwa no. 75894

A weak hadeeth about Soorah Yaa-Seen

Question:

What is the surah in the Qur'an which is considered the heart of the Qur'an?


Answer:

There is a hadeeth which suggests that Soorah Yaa-Seen is the heart of the Qur’aan, but this is a weak hadeeth.

There is no doubt that Soorah Yaa-Seen is a great and important soorah which contains moving stories and eloquent lessons, but there is no proof that it was described as the heart of the Qur’aan.

~Sheikh Muhammed Salih Al-Munajjid


SOURCE:
Islamqa, Fatwa no. 654

Working for an Insurance Company

Question:

Is life insurance halaal or haraam? What is the ruling on those who work in companies offering life insurance?


Answer:

Firstly:

Life insurance is a kind of commercial insurance, which is haraam, because it involves uncertainty, riba and gambling, and consuming wealth unlawfully. It is not permissible to work in commercial insurance companies, because this is a kind of cooperating in sin, which Allaah has forbidden, as He says (interpretation of the meaning):

“Help you one another in Al-Birr and At-Taqwa (virtue, righteousness and piety); but do not help one another in sin and transgression. And fear Allaah. Verily, Allaah is Severe in punishment”
[al-Maa’idah 5:2]


Secondly:

There is nothing wrong with your keeping the money that you earned from working in that company before you came to know that it is haraam, because Allaah says (interpretation of the meaning):

“So whosoever receives an admonition from his Lord and stops eating Ribaa, shall not be punished for the past; his case is for Allaah (to judge)”
[al-Baqarah 2:275]

With regard to the money that you took from the company after you came to know that it is haraam, then you have to get rid of it, because it is haraam wealth, so you can spend it on charitable causes.

And Allaah knows best.


SOURCE:
Islamqa, Fatwa no. 40336

Correcting Others by “Advising” and not “Condemning”

People always seek advice to gain from others’ knowledge and experience. Companies, governments, and individuals all engage in various forms of advising to move ahead and progress. Advice is also sought and given in all matters of human values pertaining to right and wrong. In general, advising others is essential for the overall betterment of groups and societies.


Providing advice by enjoining the good and forbidding the evil is an integral part of Islamic teachings. Allah says in the Quran,

“You are the best of peoples ever raised up for mankind; you enjoin Al-Ma’ruf (the good that Islam has ordained) and forbid Al-Munkar (the bad that Islam has forbidden)”
(Quran 3:110)

He also tells us that within families, we should actively advise each other to do what’s right and to stay away from the wrong. Allah says,

“O you who believe! Ward off yourselves and your families against a Fire (Hell)…”
(Quran 66:6)

As promising as the concept may seem, advising people does require a willingness and sincerity on the part of all involved. Advising takes even a different form when it is done to correct others’ faults and mistakes. In personal situations, the issues can become even more delicate and complex. That is because when done incorrectly, advising people can have a reverse effect and can hurt relationships. This usually happens when one crosses the lines of “advising” people and instead “condemns” them. One can sense condemnation when the demeanor of the person seeking to correct the other appears to find fault rather than taking a sincere interest in helping the other person to rectify his faults. Sensing any feelings of condemnation, a person’s ego becomes defensive to ward off any outright attempts at hurting it. We generally find people emerge from such interactions as being hurt, insulted and with soured relationships.

Here we look at issues related to correcting others and how we can make the most of such situations without demeaning each other and souring relationships in the process.

Your role when providing advice

When you take on the role of pointing out other people’s faults and of advising them, you actually stand a very good chance of ensuring a positive outcome – both by ensuring that the recipient attentively listens to your advice and also by making certain that your interaction with the other person doesn’t damage your relationship. You can exercise that influence by adopting the right intentions and actions and thus lessening the risk of your advice being mistaken negatively. This will help you win the person’s confidence and provide him the assurance that you could be trusted.

We should remember that while “advising” to correct someone’s mistake can be helpful and beneficial to the one being advised, it involves walking a slippery slope because one can cross the lines of mutual respect and get into “condemning” the other person instead. Condemning not only is the contradictory of providing sincere advice, it also constitutes a serious sin. For example, the Prophet (peace be upon him) even forbade even the condemnation of an adulteress, though he didn’t abrogate her prescribed punishment.
(Based on the report in Al-Bukhaaree (4/350) and Muslim (1704) on the authority of Abu Hurairah. See Sharh-us-Sunnah (10/298) of Imaam Al-Baghawee.)

Tips to consider when correcting others

Consider following some of these tips when correcting others.

Purify Your intentions: Our intentions, whether explicit or hidden, act as the catalyst in determining the final outcome of our actions. The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:

“Actions are but by intentions and each person will have but that which he intended”
(narrated by al-Bukhaari (1) and Muslim (1907))

Therefore, whenever you decide to correct and advise others, pause to ask yourself if your intent is to sincerely help the other person or to rather punish and belittle the person by exposing his defects. Surprisingly, just asking the question can reveal your hidden intentions. That will provide you an opportunity to stop yourself if you are fueled by the wrong intentions that are hidden in your psyche, which in turn can lead you on the path of “condemning” others.

Reflect the sincerity of your intentions in your demeanor: Once you are clear about your intentions, your demeanor should also reflect a sincere wish on your part to provide suggestions for improvement to the other person. It would be difficult for you to convince the other person that your intentions are pure and clean if your action and words are demeaning and punishing to the other person. Any hint of such an attitude will cause the other person to activate his defenses rather than being open and receptive to your advice. This in turn will not only lead to resentment and the weakening of your relationship but will hurt your credibility, thus locking away all future opportunities as well.

Never publicize people’s faults: Unless there are valid reasons, when correcting others it is best to keep the interaction private rather making it public. If you do it, that will make the recipient of the advice feel more humiliated and exposed. Again, if your intention is to sincerely help the other person rather than exposing his defects, the affair should be kept private. Allah (SWT) has warned us in the Quran:

“Verily, those who love that the evil and indecent actions of those who believe should be propagated (and spread), they will have a painful torment in this world and in the Hereafter. And Allah knows and you know not. And had it not been for the grace of Allah and His mercy on you, (Allah would have hastened the punishment on you) and that Allah is full of kindness, Most Merciful”
(An Noor, 24:19, 20)

According to Al-Hasan, and as reported in At-Tirmidhee and other collections in marfoo’ form [i.e. that the Prophet said]:

“Whosoever condemns his brother for a sin (he committed) that he repented from, will not die until he has committed it (i.e. the same sin) himself.”

Al-Fudail, one of the salaf, said:

“The believer conceals (the sin of his brother) and advises (him), while the evildoer disgraces and condemns (him).”

In this context, we should, therefore, also refrain from gossips and other idle talk that can lead us to discuss people’s faults. Let’s remind ourselves of the stern warnings both from Allah and His prophet about those who engage in spreading others’ defects.

Don’t go after looking at people’s faults: While advising people of their faults with the sincere intention of correcting them is acceptable, as Muslims we are also advised not to go on a witch hunt looking after other people’s faults. The prophet (peace be upon him) said,

“O you group of people that believe with your tongues while not with your hearts! Do not abuse the Muslims nor seek after their faults. For indeed, he who seeks after their (other people’s) faults, Allah will seek after his faults. And whomsoever has Allah seek after his faults, He will expose them, even if he may have committed them in the privacy of his own home”
(reported by Abu Ya’laa in his Musnad (1675) and with a strong chain of narration in Ahmad (4/421 & 424) and Abu Dawood (4880) and other soruces)

Refer people to the truth of Islam: As Muslims, when correcting someone, we should always refer them to the teachings of Islam and the prophet. This tells the other person that you aren’t forcing your opinions on them but rather simply reminding them about the divine commandments related to those matters. This will make the person more receptive to the advice rather than becoming defensive.

Understand the difference between ‘naseehah’ and ‘fadeehah’: Ibn hajar in his book points out that we should be careful to note the difference between giving advice (naseehah), and disgracing the other (fadeehah) and taking joy in it. The Prophet (peace be upon him) cautioned us when he said:

“Do not express joy at your brother’s misfortune or else Allah will pardon him for it and test you with it”
(reported by multiple sources including by At-Tabaraanee in Al-Kabeer (22/53))

This hadith therefore warns us not to rejoice at other people’s misfortunes because we could be punished by it as well. Consider that when Ibn Sireen failed to return a debt he owed and was detained because of it, he said: “Indeed, I am aware of the sin (I committed) by which this befell me. I condemned a man forty years ago saying to him: ‘O bankrupt one.’”

Advising in personal situations

As stated earlier, giving advice and correcting others takes a special meaning when done in closer relationships such as being with close friends and family members. Sharing the day to day lives with others is bound to expose our faults to others more than in other situations. Furthermore, in such closer relationships where our lives are interconnected with others, one becomes more inclined to correct and advise others. The following are some of the tips that can make the process easier and less stressful.

• When correcting others, choose words that aim to “advise” rather than condemn, demean, or punish the other.

• Avoid correcting the other person when your emotions are running high. As mentioned earlier, if your intent is to see longer term behavior change in the other person without hurting your relationship, save the advice for future when you are more in control of your emotions. Angrily advising someone is bound to push the other to erect barriers rather than staying open to listen to the advice.

• If you think that you have the right to advise others to correct their mistakes, then you also have the obligation to appreciate the good in the other person. Relationships certainly improve when you take an interest in the other person along with acknowledging and mentioning the other person’s positive traits. Appreciation is the best way to reach out to the other, touch their hearts and improve your relationship. This will also lead them to put their defenses down when you need them to listen to your advice and suggestions.

• You should also be open to advice as well. When you show that you are no exception to the rules, you reveal your rational side, thus appealing to the listener and strengthening your relationship.

• Agree on a mutual protocol about advising and correcting each other. As many times, people in close relationships object to how the other advises them and on other related matters, setting expectations with the other person about the “when”, “what”, and “how” of correcting each other can prevent getting into relationship potholes.

• Even when you know that the other person is at fault, it is important to maintain humility. Consider this story which is an important reminder: The Prophet sallallaahu ‘alaihi wa sallam said:
  

"There were two men from Banoo Israa’eel who strove equally. One of them committed sins and the other strove hard in worship. And the one who strove in worship continued to see the other sinner and kept saying to him: ‘Desist’. So one day, he found him committing a sin and said to him: ‘Desist’. He replied: "Leave me to my Lord; have you been sent as a watcher over me?" He said: "By Allah, Allah will not forgive you, nor will Allah admit you to Paradise." Then their souls were taken and they came together before the Lord of the Worlds. So He (Allah) said to the one who strove in worship: "Did you have knowledge of Me, or did you have any power over what was in my Hands?" And He said to the sinner: "Go and enter Paradise through My Mercy." And He said to the other: "Take him to the Fire." Aboo Hurairah said: "By Him is Whose Hand is my soul! He spoke a word which destroyed this world and the Hereafter for him."
(Saheeh – reported by Aboo Hurairah and collected in Aboo Daawood (Eng. trans. vol.3 p.1365 no.4883); authenticated by al-Albaanee in Saheehul-Jaami (4455))


Conclusion

Let’s remember that in the Quran, Allah the Beneficent regards Muslims as helpers, supporters, friends, and protectors of each other:

“The believers, men and women, are Auliya’ (helpers, supporters, friends, protectors) of one another"
(Quran: At-Taubah, 9:71)

Our duty, therefore, is to be genuinely concerned about each other so that we can contribute to making life pleasant in this life and to help ourselves and others to prepare for the life in the Hereafter. And to reach that end, we need to be vigilant in ensuring that Islamic teachings are implemented and followed correctly. This necessitates giving and taking correct advice and constructive criticism wherever required.



SOURCE:
– The Iqrasense.com Blogger
http://www.iqrasense.com/muslim-character/correcting-others-by-advising-and-not-condemning.html#.Tp7-rylVXH0.facebook

Dyeing Your Hair

It is permissible for a woman to dye her hair any colour other than black, so long as that is not imitating kaafir women, such as if kaafir women or some kaafir women have a special way of dyeing or cutting their hair, and that is exclusive to them; it is not permissible to imitate them in that case.

Shaykh Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (may Allaah have mercy on him) was asked: Is it permissible to dye parts of the hair such as the ends or the top only?

He replied: If the hair is to be dyed black, the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) forbade that when he told someone to change his white hair but to avoid black. He said:

“Change this white hair but avoid black.”
Saheeh Muslim (5476)

A stern warning was also narrated for the one who does that, which is when the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“There will be people at the end of time who will dye their hair black like the crops of pigeons; they will not even smell the fragrance of Paradise.”

Narrated by Abu Dawood (4212) and al-Nasaa’i (8/138); classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Saheeh al-Jaami’ (8153)

This indicates that it is haraam to change the hair colour to black. As for changing it to other colours, the basic principle is that it is permissible unless it is done in the manner of kaafir women or immoral women, in which case it is haraam for that reason, because the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:

“Whoever imitates a people is one of them.”

Narrated by Abu Dawood (4031) and classed as saheeh by al-Albaani in Irwa’ al-Ghaleel (5/109). End quote from Majmoo’ Fataawa wa Rasaa’il Ibn ‘Uthaymeen (11/120)

SOURCE:
Islamqa, Fatwa no. 82103


Using Dye other then Henna

There is nothing wrong with dyeing your hair brown or blond even if you do not use henna. What is not allowed is to dye one's hair black, because of the hadeeth narrated from the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him. And so long as by doing so she is not imitating kaafir women or immoral women.

Similarly it is not permitted to dye one's hair in a manner that imitates the kuffaar, like the "punks" why dye their hair in all kinds of colours. We ask Allaah for safety and health.

SOURCE:
Islamqa, Fatwa no. 1008, 111860

Concerning the Good Treatment of One's Parents

Points of Benefit from al-Adab al-Mufrad of Imam al-Bukhari
Compiled by Abu Madeena ibn Abdul Hameed


Honoring One's Parents

"And We have enjoined on man to be dutiful to his parents." Al-Qur'an 29:8

Imam ibn Kathir said regarding this verse:

"Allah commands His servants to be dutiful to parents ... because a person's parents are the cause of his existence [by His permission]. So he must treat them with the utmost kindness and respect, his father for spending on him and his mother because of her compassion for him."
[Tafsir ibn Kathir]

In several places in the Qur'an (including what has been cited), Allah mentions obedience to one's parents after commanding His slaves to worship Him alone. So worshiping Allah without committing shirk, which is the greatest sin of all, is connected to honoring one's parents, therefore this duty is not to be treated lightly. One can find much benefit from the following verses, concerning the manner in which parents should be honored. Allah says:

"And that you be dutiful to your parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of disrespect, nor reprimand them but address them in terms of honour."

"And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy, and say: My Lord! Bestow on them Your mercy as they did bring me up when I was young."
Al-Qur'an 17:23-24

Imam ibn Kathir explains:

"[This] means, do not let them hear anything offensive from you, not even say uff which is the mildest word of disrespect. 'Nor reprimand them' means, do not do anything horrible to them. 'Ata' bin Rabah said that it meant, 'Do not raise your hand against them.' When Allah forbids speaking and behaving in an obnoxious manner, He commands speaking and behaving in a good manner, so He says ' ... but address them in terms of honor,' meaning gently, kindly, politely, and with respect and appreciation. 'And lower unto them the wing of submission and humility through mercy' means, be humble towards them in your actions. and say 'My Lord! Bestow on them Your Mercy as they did bring me up when I was young' means, say this when they grow old and when they die." [Tafsir ibn Kathir]

Imam al-Bukhari then related the first hadith, indicating its high status over the others to come:

'Abdullah ibn 'Umar said, "I asked the Prophet, peace and blessings be upon him, which action Allah loves best. He replied:

'Prayer at its proper time.'

Then what? I asked. He said:

'Then kindness to parents.'

I asked, Then what? He replied:

'Then jihad in the Way of Allah.' "

He [ibn 'Umar] added, "He told me about these things. If I had asked him to tell me more, he would have told me more."

From the benefits of this hadith are,

• We find in the etiquettes of the Companions, that they were keen to please Allah, by performing acts which He loved, as appose to what they loved,

• It contains an example for the one who wishes to know something, that he should ask the people of knowledge, and

• We find that the following three acts are beloved to Allah:

  1. The virtue of prayer at its proper time, that is soon after the prayer time has entered as opposed to the prayer of the hypocrites who would leave prayer to just before the commencement of the following one.

  2. The kind treatment of parents, and

  3. The virtue of jihad in the way of Allah, an act which involves great sacrifice and courage.

And so between the lofty second pillar of Islam, that is prayer at its proper time, and the invitation to martyrdom - that is jihad in the way of Allah, lies the kind treatment of parents, which provides a sufficient exhortation to treat parents better, because by doing so, we earn the pleasure of Allah, following the footsteps of our pious predecessors.

Imam al-Bukhari then relates another narration from Abdullah ibn 'Umar, who said:

"The Pleasure of the Lord lies in the pleasure of the parent. The Anger of the Lord lies in the anger of the parent."
[Hasan as mawquf, sahih as marfu'. As-Sahihah (515), Shaykh al-Albani]

From the benefits of this narration are,

• We learn that Allah's Pleasure is connected to the pleasure of one's parents,

• Likewise, we learn that Allah's Anger is connected to the anger of one's parents,

• Seeking the Pleasure of Allah leads one to Paradise, and provoking His Anger leads one to the Hellfire so this narration is a key to Paradise for the one who wishes to enter it,

• Pleasing one's parents increases the bond the parent and child has, it also makes the home a pleasant environment,

• This narration confirms the Divine attribute of Pleasure, however the Pleasure of Allah is not like the pleasure of His creation, that is because pleasure is an emotion that indicates weakness where-as Allah is free from imperfection, and

• Likewise, this narration confirms the Divine attribute of Anger, however the Anger of Allah is not like the anger of His creation, that is because anger is an emotion which can lead one to do something irrational, which denotes weakness in the creation, where-as the anger of Allah is free from imperfection.

In conclusion, the importance of honoring one's parents are,

1. Obedience to Allah and His Messenger, peace and blessings be upon him,

2. Obeying and honoring one's parents is a means of entering Paradise,

3. Respecting and honoring them brings friendship and love,

4. Respecting and obeying them is a way of showing gratitude to them because they are the ones who brought you into this world, and

5. If a person honors his parents this may be the cause of his own children honoring him.

Furthermore, disobedience to one's parents is from the major sins. However if one's parents ask you to do something that is disobedience to Allah and His Messenger, peace and blessings be upon him, then you may not obey them.

As for after the parents have died (and if they died in a state of Islam), the child can do many things, such as the following:

1. If he has wealth, and his parents were in debt, he can discharge their duty by paying off the debt for them,

2. If he has wealth and his parents had not performed Hajj, he may perform Hajj on their behalf, or pay for someone else to perform Hajj on their behalf (if he has fulfilled the obligation), and

3. He may pray for forgiveness for them and pray for mercy for them.

SOURCE:
www.sunnahonline.com
http://www.sunnahonline.com/library/beliefs/0073.htm#